Dear itsy bitsy spider:

You are not going up the waterspout. You are crawling on the couch of the house I am housesitting. You are a teeny tiny likkle spiderling. In fact, you are almost cute. HOWEVER. I want to sleep on this couch soon. And... well, I do not want you crawling on my face after I begin slumbering. And seriously, I've moved you like fifteen times. You keep coming back!

Please do not come back. I like you and all, really truly. You probably eat bugs that I do NOT like. But... No. Just no. Not when I want to sleep.

Sincerely,
misxmatch.

P.S.
who's a cute likkle spiderling! Eeeee~

An open letter to the person (or people!) who stole my stuff out of my car last Wednesday will now commence.

( Dear Whomever... )

...I feel so much better, and SO PASSIVE-AGRESSIVE!

well, things have happened. lots of things, but only a few have actually been real important. More ups than downs, too, which is pretty impressive for me...

And, funnily enough, I could truthfully say that I'm really happy with where I am in life right now. I mean, things aren't perfect, but... they're close enough for me.

I have good classes, a job that I enjoy, a WONDERFUL group of friends, a chance to try things again with a most awesome boy... And I get to go and see Spamalot, which is fairly awesome.

I could probably be happier, but I just ate Cherry Garcia icecream, and I don't think I want to be anywhere else but here... with the possible exception of a certain bedroom in the Shelton area, but that's a private joke for later.

god, I love this moment.

(Not to mention, I haven't seen my mother for periods of time greater than two hours in the past... five days? This must be what living alone feels like, except with a chaffeur who cares MUCH more than they should. And nags about dishes and laundry.)

I want to go back to japan. really, really hellishly bad.

the food, and the clothing, and the people - all better than here. I could have stayed for goddamn months with that group of people. except maybe Konrad, but that's how he always is.

chikusho. I miss my second families - both of them.

Japan.

Is.

Amazing.

日本　は　楽しい　です。

That's probably a line of boxes, if you don't have computer capabilites to read Japanese. But rest assured, it's true, nonetheless. Very, very true. So is the line below.

日本人　は　とても　かっこいい　です。　だから、　日本人　は　とても　びじん　です。　私　の　ホスット　姉　は　すごい　と　びじん　です。

I still miss Olympia and my friends, though. Can we have a party when I get back?

I GOT THE JOB I GOT THE JOB I GOT THE JOB!!!!

I'm gainfully employed! Legally employed! Hired! Going to be making a nice little amount of money! 

AHHHH HAPPY EEEE I GO TO WORK TOMORROW YAY!

....oh god, I go to work tomorrow at nine. Nine! OH, UNGODLY HOUR OF MORNING.

AHHH HARRY POTTER. AHHH RABID FANGIRLING. AHHH IT'S OVER. AHH IT'S OVER.

Okay, okay. I'm done now. That's really all I needed to say, anyway.

Really.

All I needed to say. 

*cough* eeee almost boyfriend? *cough*

what is underneath the cut is quite probably the most talking about stuff I've done in a while. the only problem here, is that it might not be the -most- relevant stuff ever. ...or even remotely close, in some cases.

( 12-Pack O' Random )

I can't think of anything else to say. run out of words. that has got to be a first...

Having a shitty week. Except not. Like... my life is shitty, but certain parts of it really shine through as being pretty fun and awesome.

Like how Caitlin's writing her Japanese storybook about DANGER MONK!!!!, and mine's about an egg and a radish, and their IMPOSSIBLE LOVE~! And like, how I'm hanging out probably every day this week with a pretty awesome guy, who... might like me? sorta-maybe, and I have fun with him. Which is good. And how Hil's having a baby, so Ash is gonna be an auntie - haha, and I sorta-kinda will be. Ish.

but the shitty things (english fail, econ midterm fail, basic family FAIL), they REALLY get to me. and it's not like... they get to me daily, it's just when little things go wrong, and I get so angry or so sad. like when I use 'like' waaaayy too much in this entry.

is it bad that I just got teary over the fact that I used 'like' too much? I think it is. or it's just really really REALLY one of those days.

ahh~! I need to go eat gummi bears and read something happy. Stat!

AHHHH MOTHERLAND JAPAN!!! I got picked! I'm going to JAPAN! Land of the Rising Sun! Land of Crazy-Ass technology! Land of very little usable land!

GOD THE AWESOME! I cannot wait, holy jesus, ahhh! SQUEE!

Awesomely awesome weekend and friday night.

Friday night: Talent show, which was... meh. Okay. Then, over to Jeff's house, where it was AN ORGY!!!! with Rachael and Amanda, Peter, Jeff, Ty and I... Then Patrick joined, and people started leaving. We watched Zoolander, too. While having an orgy (we all had our shoes off, okay?).

Saturday: Rugby - which we lost MISERABLY, so that kinda sucked. But it was still fun with Sierra. Then, Rachael called, and was like, "YO! Movie." and we went and saw 300!!! WHICH WAS SO AWESOMELY AWESOME IT WAS EVEN BETTER THAN THAT. Great, really. REALLY. Then Jeff drove me home. Even though Rachael lives out here. Which was really really really awesome of him, seen as how I really didn't want to explain to Rach that I was NOT getting along with my mother that day... So Jeff was really greatly awesome. I owe him brownies, I think.

Sunday: Skiing! Huzzah. Much fun. There was also me: falling on my ass 5098367 times. Which was okay, really. Except when my knee started hurting. But then I stopped skiing, so it was all good.

My best moment of the weekend?

So, it's in the car, on the way back from Crystal Mt., Jeff and I talking from front to back seat... Talking about 300, how AWESOMELY AWESOME IT AWESOMELY IS AWESOME.
Me: SPARTANS, WHAT IS YOUR PROFESSION!?
Jeff: AUU! *punches air* AUU! *punches air* AU-! *punches roof of car*
Me: ofmg!
Jeff: Ow! Shi... SORRY!
Mom: ...Did you just hit the car roof?
Jeff And I: *laughlaughlaugh*

And yay. Plus, I just offered to give my neighbor french kissing lessons. Let's see what he does! *giggle*

omigod omigod omigod omigod WICKED!!@11!!!eleventy!

holy mother of all things... HOLY. thankyouthankyouthankyou Lena!

(On a side note, yay birthday on Friday!)

DUDE. WICKED. HOLY! HOLYYYYYY!!!!

Now, if you need me, I'll be over here... cooing over this shiny, shiny cd.

*cough* WICKED!! eheeehehe!

Rugby is the awesomest sport known to mankind. Holy FUCK, is it awesome. It combines elements of EVERYthing. Swear to god. Golf, ballet, football, soccer, wrestling; you name it, it has it. A HELL of a lot of fun to watch. Playing, god forbid, but watching is very cool. The sickening 'crackthud's as people collide takes a wee bit of getting used to, but it's just... cool.

Of course, the fact that my very attractive editor is playing helps. Not as much as I thought it would, though. When he got flung several feet, and was lying on his back on the field, though... I have to admit, my first thought was NOT, "Oh shit, I hope that guy's okay," but something along the lines of, "DUDE!! THAT GUY GOT TAKEN OUT!! Fuck, wait, that's our editor! The GOOD editor! SHIT!"

Best parts: The fact that Budd Bay Rugby kicked ASS. Lots and lots of ASS. Hanging out with awesome Photo Empress. Watching attractive editor take off shirt after game(Me: !!!, Photo Empress: Yeah. Told you you'd have fun., Me: !!!!?!). Coffee afterwards. Sticky buns!

whee. tired now, though. arr.

I HAS A FEESH!

Yay! Is a betta fish. Is prettttyyy. Huzzah!

I want a goldfish. Like, one that's little, and cute, and can live in a little bitty fish-bowl, and likes fish flakes. >.> I need a fishie to talk to again, damnit. Fish are easy to talk to, they just go 'bloop' at you. 'Bloop' is easier to deal with than interrogating questions and insinuations. Lots easier. So... I need a fish. Will someone drive me to the pet store so I can buy a fish? Please? Pretty please?

And now for something completely different!: ( Crazy-ass Ramblings on Strippers! )

have written paragraph about Rocky Horror Picture show into college essay. am impressed with self...wow.

am having really, really shitty day, otherwise. ew.

>.> fuck random crying jags in public. THE LIBRARY DOES NOT NEED TO SEE MY TEARS!!@@@111!eleventy!11

Again, for anyone who read the first one of these, this won't be a typical love letter. I never could write those - my sense of humour (dark, inapropriate, and just plain dirty) slides in, and it ends up being this mishmash of random declarations. Oh well! I like writing this style of letter, see? It helps to get things off my chest. So! To begin! These are in no particular order, and are randomer than pure chaos. The only thing these people have in common? I love 'em. Maybe just a wee bit in some cases, but... nonetheless.

( The Letter )

More... soon. Maybe.

Nervous about tomorrow's debate tournament. But it'll be fine. It's not like the world will explode, no matter what happens. Unless, y'know, someone detonates it while we're there... And that's unlikely.

Sat and talked with Avery for a long while today. Felt good. It's nice knowing that I can pour a little bit of feeling out, and get some serious answers in return. Avery doesn't sugar coat things. At all. It was nice to hear him say that I looked good today, too.

It was funny, I didn't really understand what he was talking about until I got home today. And then I looked in the mirror, and... He was right. I do look good today. I look... different. I'm not sure what exactly is different, though, just like he couldn't tell me what it was either. But... I don't think I mind.

I don't think I mind at all. I'm in a little quietly happy moment, sort of. Things are peaceful, and even if I am a little twisted up inside... I think I'll be okay. I think I'll be more than okay. I think the world will keep turning, and I think I'll spin on with it.

Because life is too beautiful to stop. You know what I mean? In the way the stars are bright, and even if they're dead, they still shine - never stop. That's how life is beautiful.

history book win.

"Black farmers tried to protect themselves by joining the Southern Tenant Farmers Union (STFU)..."

Oh, STFU, hehehe...

depressed depressed depressed. AND I DON'T KNOW WHY. *whimper* make it go away.

I think it's because I barely talk to some of my friends, I'm having a real problem with family issues, and I STILL AM EXPECTED TO BE FUCKING PERFECT. I never signed up on that volunteer list, okay? I never raised my hand and said, "Gosh, I think I'll be perfect!" NO. I never promised anything to that degree, so fuck you, people who want me to do everything and be everything and all that.

and let's not even go into the questioning look Livie throws me EVERY fucking TIME I mention a certain person's name. >.> And when she starts talking about how her dad is coming home. Liv, dearest, I love you pieces, and I know this is important to you, but when I start giving you one-word answers that consist of "mm," mostly... YOU NEED TO SHUT UP RIGHT THEN AND BACK AWAY FROM THE ABYSS OF DAD-TALK. I'd much rather discuss your current boyfriend troubles. My opinion: Dump the fucker, and be rid of him. I'm gonna be a hypocrite here for a moment, but seriously... If he passes off your emotional stuff about your dad with a "mm," just like I do and then gets all pissy about why you aren't going out to dinner with him... YOU KICK HIS ASS AND RUN. Honestly. He does not deserve the goddess-creature that you are.

argh, argh, argh. Oh, and then, I get bitched at about my 'supposed' sexuality. Excuse me, MOM, but... WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO QUESTION MY PREFERENCES?! thanks, but... um, no, I'm perfectly aware that I really DON'T want to have sex with guys, thanks much. I could kiss them, and that's how far we'd get. Period. Girls are nicer, let's just leave it at that, and LET IT GO. I almost regret telling her. Almost. I'd much rather talk to Liv about it, no matter how awkward that can get.

Me: Yeah, and it's not like I've kissed more than one girl.
Liv: ...Who'd you kiss!?
Me: *blank, blank stare*
Liv: ...OH, right. Eh-heh.
Me: ...BOX OF AWKWARD!

and hey, while I'm wishing for the depression to go away, I think I'll also wish for world peace, sex, brilliant noveling skills, my braces to go away, a nicer arse, a world where alternative sexualities are welcomed, and a steady girlfriend who likes me... Oh, and a fucking pony.

Now -what- did that girl say about the cynicism of today's youth?